Final Fantasy III Cast
Jillian
This image seems to be the current canon for their outfits based on cosplayers, so we’ll use it. Okay, hoo boy…
Blonde guy: Some kind of dual-personality Medieval thing going on here. He’s part puffy-shirted prince and part chainmail knight. If he actually went into battle wearing that, everything except his organs and crotch would be protected, so great idea. Also seems to be emotionally attached to the giant gaudy green gem on his chest that is probably important but also ridiculously vulnerable to attack, theft, etc. His hair appears to be layered but is all one length which is 100% impossible.
Girl: I don’t hate this outfit. The super-high boots are stylish and yet look comfy, she seems breezy and lightweight but is covered up. The super-short tunic shirt over black tights is a bit college skank for me, but she’s so covered up that I think she can pull it off.
Gray-haired boy: What is this buckle vest thing he’s wearing? That might be the single ugliest item reviewed so far, or at least tied with FFII Guy’s haircut. He’s also wearing a purple hoodie over a purple turtleneck, under that gigantic leather belt vest. I’m pretty sure this kid has already died of heat exhaustion from all those winter layers, but if he’s still alive he should be shot for topping it off with skin-tight white pants and a crotch purse.
Brunette boy(?): Pretty sure this is a boy based on eyelash length. I almost approve of this outfit. I feel like the giant mage coat with large, floppy collar has been over done, but pairing it with the tie-like scarf makes it more unique. Also like his color palette, very earth-toned but pastel springlike. I think he’s got a bit too much flowy-ness going on with the flowing jacket and the black straps (that must tie into a bow in the back?) and that belt is obviously completely unnecessary. He’s also a bit overly matchy; his boots match his jacket sleeves/gloves perfectly. 6/10 because of the girl and brunette boy. Wait, I just noticed blonde boy has SPURS on his already-too-ridiculous boots. Deduction for that.
Joey
Yes, I think we should use the most recent images so we have more to judge. One can only critique 50 pixels so much.
Blonde guy: Doesn’t the chainmail go up to his crotch and perhaps is worn under his shirt? I’ll give him the benefit of the doubt. That honking green gem on his chest is my biggest issue with him. Is he trying to make Kate Winslet jealous? And yes, it does seem curious that he is the only one with spurs. Is the implication that he rides while others walk? Rude.
Girl: This is probably my favorite so far. I didn’t have those types of college skanks at my school so the black tights haven’t been tainted for me. I could do without the cross, though.
Ponytail boy: Yikes. I know this series later gets super over the top with belts, but these things are beyond huge. I’m okay with the hoodie, but turtleneck seems like he’s ready for a Christmas party and not an adventure. His pseudo-fanny pack is also way too loose. How will you get at your supplies when your pack falls to your ankles when you let it go?
Brown-haired boy: I agree this one is acceptable. Especially if he tightens his belt. We’ve discussed how I like scarfs/ties but I think this is one of my least favorite ways to tie one. Despite this snafu, overall he looks pretty stylish.
Erin
Okay, I thought there was one guy and three women…evidently I had this reversed. Well, they’re all very pretty in any case.
Blond guy: Those are some sexy chainmail stockings you have on…I wasn’t aware they fit so snugly. I understand the concept of pairing contrasting textures, but puffy powder blue sleeves, probably a red velvet waistcoat with armor just seems ill advised re: fashion and practicality. And that necklace…if you’re out fighting…or gallivanting…or whatever it is you do in your spare time, get ready to be choked by someone.
Only Girl: Your outfit is pretty cute, I like the flouncy bottom of your dress. I think you should reconsider either the color of your boots or the color of your tights. Oooo or maybe switch with Puffy Knight and throw some chainmail up in there.
Gray Haired Guy-I-Thought-Was-A-Girl: You look the most comfortable out of everyone and I dig the Katniss Everdeen vibes you have going on. Your man purse is going to fall down though, ask Only Girl–she’ll help. Is it wrong that I want this outfit? Maybe with fewer buckles.
Scarf Man: Why do you need a capelet AND a scarf? I feel like I’m choking just looking at you. Are the fingerless gloves so you can turn those pages of your book? I appreciate your dedication to education. I think I had a swing coat like yours as a kid (minus the capelet, you lucky bastard). Overall, except for Blond Guy, these outfits are decent! At least no spandex!
Final Scores
| Final Fantasy III Cast | |
|---|---|
| Jillian | 5.5 |
| Joey | 5 |
| Erin | 6 |
| Total | 5.5/10 |
Final Fashionista 