Sony and Atlus gave us a sneak peek at the protagonist for the upcoming Persona 5 this week, and it got our style snark flowing. Mostly because Joey is a huge Persona fan and insisted we talk about this guy at swordpoint.

Jillian

From what little I know about Persona, I assume he’s wearing a school uniform, and based on Erin’s previous (and accurate) assessment that “uniforms do not reflect personal style,” we’re a little bit limited in our judgements. The thing that draws my eye is the red splotch on his blazer: is this a single red button? A ketchup stain? A laser pointer indicating he’s about to be sniped? The vertical arrow stitching on his turtleneck seems to scream “Hello, my eyes are up here,” but don’t worry–I wasn’t ogling this boring black and white stodginess. I like his glasses but think he needs a hair trim: with that much mop, we lose the top of his frames and the bottoms end up looking like weird raccoon accents. Ask your seatmate where the nearest barber is, stat.

Erin

As someone who wears glasses every waking minute, I can’t begin to tell you how much his hair annoys me. I want to brush it out of his eyes. It makes my forehead itch. Those lenses are 100% greasy, I’m telling you right now. As for his outfit, I also think it’s a uniform…and I think that school is Professor Snape’s School for the Sullen and Pasty.

Joey

I must admit, as hyped as I am for Persona 5, I agree that this new protagonist isn’t doing much for me. Persona 4’s protagonist exuded confidence. This new guy’s neatly-pressed, high-collared look and mousy hair somehow make him seem too insecure. Unless he is in biblical school to become a priest? I’m curious to see how the other characters rock the uniform and if they can make it work.